Tuesday, July 25, 2006

No!

It's rare that I come across a new article that provokes a primal scream from me, but the latest modification to the popular boardgame Monopoly did it. It's probably because I'm from South Jersey that this pisses me off:
In an effort to remain relevant, venerable board game Monopoly has been given an electronic European makeover. Capitalist robber barons in the UK will now have the option of making a cashless fortune thanks to a new version of the game that features an electronic card from Visa instead of paper money.
This modification reeks of politically correct egalitarianism. Presumably one could even dig up a study from some E.U. agency that demostrates that sniggering over huge piles of cash is especially damaging to children's self esteem.

Personally, it's the sniggering over the huge piles of cash that is the real fun of Monopoly. When I was young, the players with all the money tended to go for Indiana Jones coolness by saying things like "Here's 10 bucks kid. Go buy yourself a decent meal." Occasionally we'd go for the patronizing ganster cool from the black and white movies by saying things like "Johnny, you're a mess. Look, here's 50 bucks. Have dinner. Take your wife to a movie. Live a little." Patronizing the other players by swiping a debit card through a card reader is just too liberal; it's like being a Streisand lackey buying groceries for a homeless person instead of giving him money for hookers and booze.

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